Cake For Two
by Bonzai-Bunny
Summary: Raito was not having a good day and it was all L and his damned cake's fault.


Warning: Slight sexual situation, Raito's potty mouth.  
Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note in any way, shape, or form.  
Authoress Note: Oh, my. I had a lot of fun writing this. This was inspired by "Cake: A Misunderstanding."  
Which you should go read. Now.

-o0o-

Raito was not having a good day. In fact, his day was becoming progressively worse by the second, which was saying something, considering he was chained to an insomniac. After he woke up, with about only an hour of sleep, and after 'refreshing himself', he had managed to put on his pants backwards and forget his socks. Raito swore that he could _feel _Ryuuzaki's amused smirk.

So there he sat, glaring a hole at the detective's head, bleary-eyed from lack of sleep, which L seemed to completely ignore.

He was too busy indulging in cake.

Their handcuff chain hung lifelessly between them, occasionally clinging and reminding Raito just how much he was stuck there.  
There was nothing new to look at, no new leads. Raito was beginning to understand himself why the detective was so depressed, as he propped his chin on his face and sighed. What was the point of this? Raito turned to face the older male when he heard a sigh of contentment and watched with muted horror as L practically performed fellatio on the fork.

_No, he didn't, _Raito thought incredulously. This was just the workings of a perverse teenage mind, wasn't it?

But no, it wasn't.

Ryuuzaki dug another forkful out of the cake, ate it, and proceeded to lick the icing off of the utensil in possibly the most sensual way Raito could have imagined. His tongue wrapped around its metal prongs, incredibly slow, as to savor the flavor of the icing. (_Vanilla! _Raito's mind shrieked.) With another soft sigh, he put the fork in his mouth and slid it out, now icing free.

Raito quickly turned to his screen and forced his eyes to read what was on it. He _did not _see that and, no, Raito was _not _getting excited by that. He willed his perfect composure and neutral facial expression back.

The male turned slightly to see the detective's unblinking, obsidian eyes staring at him.

Shit. Raito had been caught staring.

"Would Raito-kun like some cake?"

The Kira suspect was about to open his mouth to say, "No" when L slid his chair over presumably to hand the plate over to Raito. The words left his lips when L's hand slipped and the cake landed in Raito's lap. Well, not his lap. In the open space on the chair between his legs, which he had, thankfully, uncrossed when Ryuuzaki was eating his cake earlier.

But that wasn't the worst of it. The worst was that L had apparently disregarded where the cake had landed and had begun to prod at it with his fork. To say Raito was shocked, would be an understatement.

"Ryuuzaki!" He eventually choked out, incredulously, as L swallowed a piece of cake.

"Cake should not be wasted, Raito-kun." The detective stated, as though it were obvious and blasphemy to think could feel his eye beginning to twitch. He gave L a look that translated to, "Can you be any more socially retarded?" The detective reached for the cake again only to have his wrist grabbed by the irate teen. There was a moment of silence in which both stared each other down, with hidden challenge in both of their eyes. They were daring each other to try and do something and the longer the silence went on, the broader Raito's triumphant smirk grew.

That is, until L shocked them both by using Raito's grip on his wrist as leverage to pull the boy's chair to face him and bent down to lap up the cake _with his mouth._

Raito's eyes widened and a blush threatened to stain his cheeks. He was too shocked to do anything by the mere fact that L's mouth was _inches away from his crotch. _Raito took a deep breath and tried to calm himself down. In the steadiest voice he could manage he asked,

"Ryuuzaki, could you kindly move your face?" The statement had such a hint of desperation in it; Raito could only hope that the detective caught it.

But who was L to notice?

The Kira suspect became mortified when L completely ignored him and continued to eat his cake, face-first. There were many reasons for this mortification.

One, if someone, say Raito's father, were to walk in at that moment, it would look _really _bad.

Two, unless you are in the receiving end of a blow-job, nobody _wants_ someone's face in your crotch.

And three, the most prominent reason, Raito was still a teenage boy. Therefore he was prone to have his mind in the gutter, no matter how much of a genius he was, which led to certain embarrassing situations. Raito did not take care of these situations very often, especially not since being handcuffed. Needless to say, most of the mortification came from when his crotch suddenly, against his will, changed positions.  
While Raito tried his best to will his budding erection away, the only thing that came to mind was L practically performing fellatio on a fork moments earlier.

Damn, it sucked to be male.

L, however, did not notice this change immediately and continued his cake eating. Raito could feel the male's warm breath against his groin, which did nothing to deter his problem and only made it worse. It was then, that L did notice. He looked up, with vanilla icing very much all over his face. His large, black eyes stared in their normal emotionless, calculating way.

"It appears Raito-kun is aroused."

Raito felt like smacking him.

"No shit." He muttered, hoping that his face wasn't as red as he thought it was. He looked down and wrinkled his nose at the mess of cake that was still there. Hopefully the older male wouldn't be making any more attempts to eat it.

"There is no need to be vulgar Raito-kun; I was merely stating the obvious." The detective put himself back into his original seating position at a more respectable and less erection-inducing distance.

"This is a very interesting development . . ." L bit his thumb nail in thought. "Is it because of me or is it simply because Raito-kun is sexually deprived?"

If the Kira suspect had been eating or drinking anything, he most certainly would have spit it out. Sometimes L's bluntness was just a little too much. He shut his eyes to calm himself.

"I'm not having this conversation with you."

Raito simply turned his attention once again to his computer screen with such a solid resolve, anyone would think his plan was to just ignore the problem and it'll go away. Unfortunately, this neither worked for his boner or L. He could feel the detective's gaze burning through his side and he resisted the urge to punch something when L muttered, "Two percent."

"Neither, okay? Neither!" Raito all but shouted. God, he was getting a headache. Being near the detective was making him outburst more than usual.

L tilted his head to the side, doing an uncanny imitation of an owl. "Interesting. Raito-kun's aggression appears to be caused by sexual frustration. In fact, the probability of this is eighty-three percent. Does he not relieve his problems usually?"

Ryuuzaki did _not _just ask that. Ryuuzaki _did not _just ask if Raito masturbated enough. But, unfortunately for Raito, the detective didn't stop there.

"I'll take Raito-kun's silence as a 'yes'."

The younger male, slowly turned toward L, an aggravated glare on his face that could have made almost anyone wilt underneath the gaze. Anyone except L. Who was biting on a thumb nail, charcoal eyes rolled to the ceiling in thought.

"Perhaps if he copulated with Amane-san, as she wishes, he wouldn't be in this situation." The brief amusement in L's voice would have been undetectable to anyone, but Raito caught it and his eyes narrowed immediately.

L was making fun of him! Fine, he would play along.

"In front of you, Ryuuzaki?" Raito scoffed. "No thanks."

"Raito-kun is mistaken if he believes that I would enjoy watching him and Amane-san engage in sexual activities."

"Ryuuzaki is mistaken if he believes that I would do such a thing anyway." Raito answered back, mimicking L's tone of speech. He could feel the annoyance beginning to radiate off of the detective. Oh, this was going to be fun.

"Which proves my theory on Raito-kun being sexually deprived." L shot back at him, causing Raito's smirk to immediately drop. The Kira suspect rolled his chestnut eyes.

"Oh please. You're probably more sexually deprived than I am. Like you could get any."

In an instant, L was invading his personal space again. His lips hovered above Raito's ear, his voice barely above a whisper. "Again, Raito-kun is mistaken. I don't indulge in sexual activities because I'm forced not to. I don't because I choose not to." The detective's hand was on Raito's thigh, burning though his pants leg, and Raito could almost feel L's lips on his ear. If there was any hope of Raito's boner disappearing, it shot out the window, because now his erection stood tall and prouder than before.

L backed away slightly, and there was a strange look in his eyes. Though the rest of the emotion was masked, something danced in those obsidian eyes and a shiver went down Raito's spine.

"But right now . . ." He leaned in closer. Their noses were almost touching and Raito could feel the other's breath on his lips. He swallowed, partially too shocked, and partially too horny to find the will to push L away.

"I think I choose to." He tilted his head and leaned in as Raito closed his eyes. The wait for L's lips to be upon his own was agonizing.  
Because he waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Until finally Raito, frustrated, opened his eyes.

And noticed L was nowhere near him. In fact, L was back at his spot at the computer screen, giving the Kira suspect a flat look.

"I would appreciate it if Raito-kun would stop procrastinating and get back to work." With that, L turned to his computer, completely ignoring Raito for the umpteenth time that day.

Hot blood rushed to Raito's face at once from not only embarrassment, but absolute rage.

L had _played him. _Never before had Raito wanted to strangle that pale, thin, neck than he did now. Screw Kira! Raito would kill the man for him! The suspect took slow, deep breaths to calm his infuriation. It didn't work. Raito was still incredibly pissed off at the detective. He glared daggers at the older male; a scowl was set on his face, yet was still ignored. L showed no signs of even knowing that he was the target of such hate, and simply pulled a sugar cube from seemingly out of nowhere and popped it into his mouth.

A vein throbbed in Raito's forehead. At least it wasn't cake.

The younger male turned to his own screen, deciding that if L was going to ignore him, he would ignore him back, as childish of a resolve that was. Raito was so wound up in his turmoil, he didn't notice L's tiny smile.

L's day was a very good one, indeed.

Owari.

-o0o-

Authoress Note: Oh, L's such a bastard. XD I actually like this story, so reward my harsh efforts and review.


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